FHP 308 – Expectations Can Make Or Break Your Success

When we start a new program we of course have “expectations” about what we’ll get out of it.

But what if the reason we’ve never fully seen the results we want is because of our “expectations” of what the outcome will be?

What if we are expecting too much? What if our binary definition of success is holding us back?

What if the benefit of each thing we do isn’t as simple as “did we or did we not get (insert outcome here)”?

Now I’m not saying not to expect yourself to work or not have high expectations when it comes to what you want out of things.

But I think too often we set our expectations only on reaching a specific goal and not on the LEARNING PROCESS involved in achieving that outcome.

It’s also why we can get really down and feel like nothing has ever worked for us. We are only seeing victory as did we or didn’t we reach our goal.

If we instead saw each thing we’ve done as a chance to LEARN so we can build upon that next time?

Well we’d end up getting a lot further faster.

And we’d probably feel like we’re “starting over” a lot less. When we start something new, we need to set our expectations to be what can be LEARNED from this experience? How can we grow?

If our expectations are simply to learn? We’re going to get far more out of every experience.

We need to think of our journey as building a bridge.

Too often in our mind we simple see success as going from point A to point B.

But each thing we do can teach us something about how to truly build that bridge to get us across

Each experience can add a piece to make our bridge more sturdy.

Each experience can show us how to move closer to our goal, even if it is the pitfalls to avoid.

And in doing the habits and implementing the systems to move forward? Often we will reach our goal and before we know it.

Sometimes taking our focus OFF the outcome and putting it onto the building process, the daily habits, ultimately helps us reach our goal faster.

Because we’re putting in the work and doing what we should.

Instead of just focusing on how far we have still to go.

When building the bridge, you don’t want to keep looking up and thinking “Are we there yet?”

You want to think about what next piece you have to lay out to get across!

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10 Comments

Robin Dutton on March 2, 2021 at 2:38 pm

Can’t thank you enough for these podcasts. You always know what to say and when to say it it seems..messages hit home and ultimately we all need to give ourselves more grace..know we are worthy and allow the journey to happen..forcing things doesn’t work but trusting the process and learning along the way are all too key. Its never too late to learn. “SHOSHIN”
Fred Miller on March 2, 2021 at 5:15 pm

This is why life should be lived backwards. I’ve tried and done things like yoga and getting certified, Zen meditation with silent retreats for 7 days, Vision Quests for a week with 4 day only water fasts in the wilderness and other things. Each one was super interesting, but not an answer in and of itself. After 69 years I realize that each experience was a piece to the puzzle and not a stand alone answer. But at the beginning of each “thing” I EXPECTED it to be what I was looking for. Nope…another stepping stone.

I’d love to leave an amazing comment on iTunes, but I can’t find iTunes.
Cori Lefkowith on March 9, 2021 at 5:07 am

I’m so glad they help Robin! You’re rocking everything. Just remember there will always be ups and downs!!
Cori Lefkowith on March 9, 2021 at 5:08 am

So well said! Every experience is exactly that…a stepping stone. One piece in our unique puzzles. And thanks Fred! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/redefining-strength-fitness-hacks/id1141688163
Noel A on October 13, 2022 at 5:12 pm

Thanks for these details ,
Is a lot to note and practice it with focus and plan .

Thanks ✨ Cori
Cori Lefkowith on October 17, 2022 at 8:34 pm

So glad it helps Noel!
Diane on March 16, 2024 at 1:56 pm

The best advice! Be present to the process not focused on the imagined goal.
Cori Lefkowith on March 17, 2024 at 3:59 pm

LOVE that way of putting it!
Cindy Taylor on October 23, 2025 at 4:10 pm

This is exactly what i needed to hear today. Thank you!
Cori Lefkowith on October 26, 2025 at 5:33 pm

So glad it helped Cindy!