You end up pleasing no one. Especially not yourself.
I personally believe we will ALWAYS care about what other people think…it’s how we can actually function as a society.
But we also have to learn to filter what we care about.
We have to learn to recognize when someone gives us an opinion that isn’t in line with what we need or want.
And then we have to be ok with them judging us because we don’t go along with what they believe.
But we have to remember we are doing this to be true to ourselves.
Because whether we make ourselves happy is really what matters long term. You are stuck with yourself. You have to be the one that ultimately lives with your decisions.
I mention this because often when we make lifestyle changes, make sacrifices others don’t understand, we will meet resistance and judgement.
And it can feel awkward.
It can feel awkward to skip the chips or bread. To not have the drink. To pick something “healthy” off the menu.
And while I firmly believe we need to strike a lifestyle balance right for us, at times that does mean NOT eating things that we may have in the past.
And that can bring with it judgement from friends and family.
These judgements so often derail us from reaching our goals.
But I want to discuss how to take ownership and stick to what truly matters most to us.
I want to discuss how to make sure you’re focused on doing what makes YOU happy over just trying to appease someone else….
1: Don’t jump to conclusions about their statement or critique.
So often we think something is negative that isn’t. Or we add a connotation to something that isn’t there because of our own insecurity.
We may feel weird about not having something. Or about picking a healthy option.
Take a second to pause and assess. And even don’t hesitate to CLARIFY what the person meant.
Realize often it really is our own lens that is coloring our interpretation of what they’re saying.
And then, if it isn’t, even try to see the perspective THEY are coming from.
Maybe is it their own insecurities making them say things in certain ways.
2: Reiterate why it matters to you.
If someone critiques me, often in my response back I will remind myself of why what I’m doing matters to me.
It is just that added reinforcement while also trying to educate.
If they call me out for getting something healthy, I may even say…
“Yes, I’m getting something healthy because it will taste good and help me feel amazing tomorrow.”
I remind myself of why what I’m doing is worth it to me.
3: Realize everything comes with a sacrifice.
I don’t think it is bad to recognize that it will take sacrifice to reach a goal.
Nothing in life is about doing what we want, when we want all of the time.
There are sacrifices that come with success.
We are always choosing one thing which causes us to “miss out” on another opportunity and experience.
But the sacrifices are worth it because it moves us toward the goals and experiences we truly want.
I think reminding ourselves that sacrifice is a part of everything is key.
Because then, when we do feel maybe awkward about a decision we are making, we can remind ourselves that this is part of the process of ultimately staying true to ourselves.
It isn’t easy at times to be the person sticking to their macros or not having the drink. But reminding yourself of why this sacrifice is even worth it, can help you stay true to what truly matters to you, over giving into peer pressure.
4: The simple fact is…haters gonna hate.
No matter what choice we make, there is always someone out there judging that doesn’t agree.
By taking any stance, making any decision, taking any action, you are going against what someone else believes.
I think sometimes we just have to realize that not everyone will agree with what we do or believe in it. And that is a-ok.
Sometimes we just have to simply admit we can agree to disagree.
And, at times, we may even have to realize we’ve grown apart from certain people in our life and it’s time to move forward – that, while hard, it is best for both of us.
Do not be afraid to move forward.
Realize that criticism comes from you being successful even!